Here we are again. Another time around to pick up all the pieces…all the tiny pieces of her that broke apart. Her heart doesn’t break; her heart is on ice. It is someplace I can’t reach somewhere between the frozen peas and popsicles it waits; waiting for someone worth breaking over. It’s not her heart but her face that crumbles, when she looks at me and asks me why?
All I can do is start gluing the cracks in her perfect face. Maybe I’m just not good enough at putting it back together, because each time the pieces are getting smaller and smaller and harder to find. Because this time the sparkle which is normally located in the upper right hand corner of her pupils has gone missing…and I just cant seem to find it.
It won’t be long now before a new and exciting man strolls into her apartment…her life…her heart. It will start the same -Oh no, were just friends- Dont worry, were just fuck buddies- Yeah were dating, but its casual. But eventually…eventually it’s more. So I will assure her it will work out when she comes to me in tears. And I will tell her they will make a cute couple when she seems insecure.
I’ll grin and bear it when I hear about how great the sex is. I will sit back and wait hoping for the best even though it kills me. I learn to love them because she loves them. Wanting to hate them but not being able to because they make her happy. Knowing I am just a little girl that could never fulfill or complete her…and maybe it’s masochistic to keep trying…but I guess that’s just the way of things.